21 and Invincible

Currently located in the kitchen, I've decided to make macaroni & cheese. Partially cause I love it, and partially cause it's the easiest thing to make for the siblings and I - parent date night. I poured myself a smidgen of wine to help in tasting the pasta and my mind immediately drifted.

I'm feeling very contemplative. Maybe nostalgic is a better word. Then again, maybe analytical is more suited... Either way, I've been thinking - I know, always a bad thing. And the majority of my thoughts have been about old times. Just thinking about the past couple of years and how I got to where I am today... blah blah blah.

Today was 'spring cleaning' day. Upon waking up, I proceeded to drag each and every packed-to-the-brim box into my living room, along with everything I'd already unpacked - basically everything I own. So I start organizing things into piles (this is what I do best) and I finally hit the bottom of the last box. As I finally took a second to look around, I was disappointed. Every single material object in my life fit in one room, more specifically, on the dining room table. Mind you, it's a large table that seats 8, but still. The extent of my influence, my footprint, if you will, was so insignificant compared to those I surround myself with.

I can't tell you how many people I have helped move or organize who had enough things in their one room to overflow a 3000 sq. foot house. I mean, I know material possessions aren't an indicator of much, and most probably envy the lack of clutter I maintain. But seriously? I'm probably throwing a fit and tantrum, but as for me? I'd like to feel like I am leaving an imprint of myself on this world. Oh well, hopefully someday I'll design a building that's nice and showy and has a HUGE imprint - metaphorically speaking, of course. I would be quite the anti-green architect if I really made the largest building possible just cause...

And while I was sifting through my things, sorting and throwing things away, passing things on to my little sister, and setting items aside for the salvation army (which - by the way - everyone should do cause it's a good deed and helps out a lot of unfortunate people) I took a small trip down memory lane. I've been through a lot these past few years.. Forget high school, let's even skip 18. I've moved a total of 6 times, in four years. I've worked in 5 different restaurants, lived with friends and co-workers, as well as family, gone back to school after a 3 year break, and disappointed a hell of a lot of people in the process. You can imagine the amount of people that entails. It's no secret that I get to know people quickly, and that means numerous connections were created, whether or not they were treated appropriately.

All in all, I'll spare you the "now I see all of my mistakes and those I took for granted" speech. Just, for those of you still here, know that I have seen MOST of my mistakes, and I DO realize how many of you I took for granted. It's been a rough growing up and so many people helped make sure that happened the way it was supposed to - more or less.

Alright, enough with the sappy lamentations. I'm ready to go back to California now! I know I have a month to go, just wanna be prepared. Until then, I'm just living 21 and invincible...